I need a hug

Today was probably the worst day since being diagnosed that I have had. This also includes my emotional breakdown that I had almost 2 weeks ago now, and trust me, that was bad. That day was only bad because I was dealing with a weeks worth a suppression of everything that I was going through. I didn't try to let it show that first week, but by the time I realized Dr. T wasn't going to give the attention I needed, that's when the reality of the severity of my condition hit me. I cried for almost an hour straight.

I have not cried today, but it's still easily the worst day that I have had. I have stuck to my diet really well, and have had great results. I was starting to get a bit more comfortable with the insulin injections, the food portions, not having sugar, etc. But today, I could not for the life of me keep my blood sugar levels up. I dipped so low, so quickly, it's like a roller coaster. I have felt so sick all day. Dizzy, nauseated, headache... All I could think all day was, "I need a hug". I still need a hug, and I'll get it from Rob at some point tonight. Maybe when he gets home from the store...

On the only bright side of the day is that I have had two very thin pieces of pumpkin pound cake, and a raspberry jelly filled donut. Yes that's right, I intentionally spiked my sugar. Like my doctor said, better for my blood to be high than I drop and slip into a hypoglycemic coma. Oh the joys of being diabetic! So now, I feel like crap because my blood sugars are too high. I'm so frustrated that I've been doing so well with my sugar levels that today sucked. I haven't been able to control it. I know there are going to be days like this, but it doesn't make it any less frustrating.

Some of you may be thinking, "hey, be happy! You get to have sugar to elevate your levels"... What I did today was stupid and not the right way to try to get my sugars back up. But I was desperate to feel better, but to no avail.  I can't wait until tomorrow and I can see my dietitian. I'm excited to gain a better knowledge on how to control this. I'm sure there are going to be some food blogs coming soon. (Of course when I say some, I mean a WHOLE lot) I think it's important that people know that eating healthy can be delicious. You wouldn't believe it! And lastly, something to help me cheer up... one of the cutest picture of Autumn (though every picture of her is so darn cute!